To Excel or Not to Excel

One of the symbols of the Great Recession is seasoned office workers wondering if they should bother updating their skills.* Specifically, the question is asked thousands of times each day across America: "Should I learn Excel?"

Since I began my career about the same time that Microsoft Office became a standard workplace tool, I have never had to ask myself this question. I have, to put it simply, always known Excel. Do I know how to do intricate calculations? No, but I can create a spreadsheet and make all the numbers add up, and that's about 80 percent of what you need it for.

In fact, I have to admit to some bratty kid thoughts here, as I have often wondered why some people seem to have a problem learning new software. Never mind that I learned Excel, Outlook, email, drawing and publishing programs, and how to use the Internet almost by osmosis, just by being a certain age at a certain time. I never had a formal software class until I had to learn the web design program Dreamweaver, and I went into that already knowing a simpler version.

Kinder people than me have told me that it is not uncommon to fear new experiences, and having to figure out how ones and zeroes make rows and columns is, for many, a scary thing. Not everyone came of working age at the exact time that Microsoft was taking over offices across the world. I try to put myself in their shoes, but admittedly, my empathy well has been experiencing a drought.

But God sometimes decides to poke your shoulder and then look the other way, suppressing a giggle. For fun and some extra cash, I am working this holiday season behind the fine jewelry counter at Macy's, and I have been experiencing a new feeling: inadequacy.

I can work the cash register. I know to look for the 24k gold stamp. I know freshwater pearls are the lumpy ones. But that was about the extent of my knowledge when I started a few weeks ago. Now I have to learn about grades of diamonds, how to log purchases to please the auditors, and how to sign people up for credit cards. I have to know how black diamonds get that way, where the necklace boxes are and which keys go to which cabinet. I might even have to learn how to send a ring out for sizing and how to take links out of thousand-dollar watches.

And a few days ago, I realized I felt really stupid.

It's not my co-workers or my manager -- they're great, and encourage questions. No, it's me, coming up to a chasm in my knowledge and trying to decide how to bridge it (that's another thing to know: what is "bridge" jewelry?). So yes, now I know how people who do not know Excel feel when they sit down at the computer the first time and click on the icon with the spreadsheet.

But I also know this: after a certain age, you know more than you think you do. It may not be knowledge you access everyday, but it is there. Excel newbies realize that the same basic skills they use to email their friends apply to other programs, and then perhaps get a bit excited when they see the software do a bunch of tedious adding for them.

As for me, I love jewelry, so all of this learning will be done in the presence of pearl rings, gold bangles, and diamond solitaires. One day last week, I watched a limp pearl necklace and a tired-looking woman transform each other. Her face lit up, and the necklace seemed to glow as well. Sometimes learning new things leads to surprises, but you don't know until you try.

*This post is dedicated to Annie J., who teaches people to use computers and will be eligible for sainthood in about fifty years.